Let’s face it, Andrew Tate isn’t going away. Despite bans and backlashes, he continues to appeal to a generation of young men who feel disconnected, unheard and unsure of what it means to “be a man”. That’s why it might be time to bring back something a little unfashionable but deeply powerful: chivalry. Not the door-holding, cape-wearing, sword-fighting kind, but something quieter, more grounded, and a lot more useful.
Real Strength Looks a Lot Like a Bin Crew in Harrow
Take this week’s story from Harrow, where waste collectors spotted a young girl dangling from a rooftop. Without hesitation, they grabbed a mattress from a nearby skip and positioned it beneath her. Seconds later, she fell, landing safely thanks to their quick thinking. No posturing. No boasting. Just courage, care, and community spirit.
It wasn’t a TikTok stunt or a bid for virality. It was simple human decency, and perhaps, the kind of masculinity worth encouraging.
Can Netflix Really Fix Boys?
Enter Netflix’s Adolescence, a French drama that’s now being shown in schools as part of the fight against toxic masculinity. The series follows a 13-year-old boy who gets sucked into a dark online world of misogyny and incel culture. It has sparked debate across the UK, with some calling it a vital educational tool and others saying it’s just fearmongering with subtitles.
Is the show any good? Critics are split. Some praise its raw depiction of adolescence and the dangers of unchecked online influence. Others think it’s a bit dramatic and treats teenage boys as digital time bombs. According to The Guardian, French authorities believe it could teach empathy and counteract the pull of figures like Tate.
The reality is more complicated. Toxic masculinity isn’t a virus you catch from a YouTube video. It’s shaped by schoolyard dynamics, peer pressure, family structures, and a society that often still tells boys to “man up” while ignoring their emotional needs.
Are Screens the Enemy?
Sure, social media platforms play a role. TikTok and YouTube algorithms do not exactly encourage emotional intelligence. But blaming tech alone misses the point. If a teenager gets their entire view of manhood from a guy flexing shirtless while ranting about “high value men”, we have to ask why they don’t have better examples in the first place.
Ashley Walters, who plays a teacher in Adolescence, said in a follow-up interview that he’s now limiting his own son’s screen time. Fair. But what’s really needed are better role models and more conversations about what it means to be strong without being aggressive, and confident without being cruel.
Gentlemen 2.0
So what would modern chivalry actually look like? It’s not about being the knight in shining armour. It’s about being emotionally available. It’s checking in on your mates. It’s taking accountability when you mess up. It’s about protecting others, not your ego.
Maybe it’s telling your friend it’s okay to cry. Maybe it’s calling out casual misogyny in a group chat. Maybe it’s doing your bit on the school run without expecting a medal.
In other words, it’s doing the right thing without waiting for applause. Like the Harrow bin crew. They didn’t save that girl for the likes.
Time to Talk About the Real Issue
We cannot talk about toxic masculinity without addressing male mental health. The statistics are grim. Suicide is still the leading cause of death for men under 50 in the UK. According to the Mental Health Foundation, men are far less likely to reach out for help, and more likely to suffer in silence.
This is where chivalry—real, modern chivalry—can make a difference. It isn’t just about stepping up for others. It’s about looking out for yourself and your mates too.
If you’re struggling, or know someone who is, there’s help available:
- CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) – for men, open 5pm to midnight daily
- Samaritans – 24/7 confidential support at 116 123
- Mind – mental health resources for all ages
- Shout – text SHOUT to 85258 for free mental health support
Some boys will watch Adolescence. Others will idolise Andrew Tate. But if we want to shift culture, it won’t come from banning influencers or banning phones. It’ll come from showing young men that there’s another way to be powerful—one that doesn’t require shouting, shaming, or showing off.
It might even involve a wheelie bin and a mattress.
